I'm a pro songwriter/producer out here in L.A. and I have a lead from a major Japanese music company looking to sign a hot new female artist. They're looking to market the artist in the Asian and European markets. You might not know this, but the Asian and European music markets are bigger than the American market, and they're a lot more accepting of new artists, especially Americans. So, the idea is to make the artist a star in Asia and Europe, then bring them over to the U.S. and try to make them big here.
I'm looking to find the female artist, to develop, produce and write to showcase to this company. The right girl has to be sexy, willing to dress like a Pussycat Doll, great singer, no hang-ups with boyfriends or anything (will probably have to travel out of the country a great deal). I usually charge $2500 per track, but would like to do an exchange of service deal where I produce for free in exchange for cooking, massages, etc.
Please respond with pictures, mp3's if possible, myspace pages, etc. and I'll tell you a lot more about who I am and what I've done. Please respond to songwritingdude@hotmail.com
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Dear Creepy Songwriting Dude,
Now I know this is Los Angeles and there is a crop of girls just waiting to be plucked and peeled by your perverted hands in exchange for the chance of pop star fame and glory so what's with the innuendos? Why don't you just be up front about your disgusting pervertedness and let these hot slutty Pussycat-like girls know what you really want? "Cooking?" "Massages?" Homey don't play dat! Of course you make it look like you are doing these potential hookers a huge favor because you usually charge $2500 per track, BUT...for you my naked slutty friends, I will cut you a deal. Some young fresh-off-the-bus gals may think hmmm...Cooking? Massages? Doesn't seem so bad but then your creeeepy intentions will eventually pop to the surface and pulverize their hopes and dreams of becoming a Japanese superstar and cause them to distrust any future "producers."
Now I would like to direct your attention to a section on Craigslist called "Erotic Services." Yes these gals may not be willing to exchange their services for your so-called production services but they are ripe and ready to jump into your bug-infested crotch and do the nasty for sometimes as little as $100 per hour! So please PLEASE stay out of Talent Gigs and hire your prostitutes elsewhere. Do not attempt to dirty up an innocent girl you sick piece of shit.
